noun General Slang

gold star

· noun · lgbtq

A gay person who has never had heterosexual sex.

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Definitions

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A gold star lesbian has never had sex with a man; a gold star gay has never had sex with a woman. Born in the US in the 1990s as a defiant clapback — when the world kept saying 'you just haven't met the right man,' calling yourself a gold star meant 'no, I'm SUPER gay.' Used jokingly, sincerely, or as a stereotype.

“She announced she was a gold star lesbian like it was a medal — which, in the 90s, kind of was.”
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gold star In A Sentence

She announced she was a gold star lesbian like it was a medal — which, in the 90s, kind of was.

Origin & Usage

US LGBTQ slang, 1990s; earliest documented use in a 1995 stand-up bit by comedian Carol Steinel. Now widely criticised as exclusionary toward bi people, trans people and survivors of sexual violence.

Variants gold star lesbiangold star gay
Tags #lgbtq#lesbian#gay#slang

People Also Ask

Is 'gold star lesbian' offensive?

Increasingly, yes. Critics say it polices sexuality through a narrow, genital-based lens — excluding bisexual people, erasing trans lesbians and gay men, and stigmatising survivors of sexual assault. Many queer writers now treat it as a 'toxic label' rather than a badge.

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